Skills are not instant
Learning how to either develop new habits and/or leave other ones behind takes time.
I know that might seem like an obvious statement, but one of the most common things I hear from people is: “I tried that once and it didn’t work” or “It was way too hard, so I just stopped”. Having “it” not work or feeling that it is too hard needs your re-evaluation of how you are going about it. You need to think of it as developing a skill. And like all skills, it requires that you:
Go at a reasonable pace where you are challenged, yet not frustrated.
Pick a starting point that represents your current abilities and tolerance for change.
Realize that it is not an all or nothing endeavour. There are shades of trying and it does not need to be like a light switch where it is either on and bright or off and dark. Your efforts are more like a dimmer switch for that light.
Consistently keep trying and growing
If you were teaching a child how to dive into a pool, would you take him/her to the top of a cliff and say “After you jump, just make yourself go in head first”? Of course not. You would start slowly at the edge of the pool or dock and encourage him/her to take steps that challenge them but that do not frustrate them to the point of quitting. Over time, you will see their skills increase and with diligence everyday, they will be able to dive from much higher up.
Your development, your skill
Whether you’ve wanted to start yoga, quit smoking, drink less, write more and/or just be nicer to yourself and others, ask yourself this: Have I thrown myself off the cliff when starting change? Or have I treated it like a skill and slowly but very steadily tried to increase it? I have a book out entitled “Creating YOUR Personal Development: How To Do It Everyday and Thrive“. It is an eight chapter guide that works with you to create, sustain and continually grow your personal development endeavor. It is available on Amazon. I’d love your feedback and hope that you find it a valuable tool.